自由飞翔

In a big big world, it’s not a big big thing if we leave apart

But I do feel, that I do will miss you much.

Never can be imagined how hard it is for me to give it up, and

Sealed up the memory of all joyful moments I have enjoyed with you

But there comes time to say farewell

Reasons are excuses for both of us, which written on our faces today

In another mood of deeper misery

Thank you for coming into my life when I was low

Thank you for your whispers when I was alone

Thank you for your cares when you also need to be cared

Thank you for your patience which you were not born to have

Thanks a lot

But forgive me

Forgive my lack of confidence of being together, and the unsure feelings I’ve caused you

Forgive my ignorance of the start, and the consciousness of the end

If I could, I would rather be a lover than a friend

If I could, I would rather be a resident bird than a ranger

If I could, I surely would

Don’t cry for me, my dear

If you still feel my heart

Dawn is keen

But means another day has gone

The last examination in my college life, Finite Element Method, signed a signature on the terminal of all my tests, ever since 1990.

There are totally eight questions and they are everything about Applied Elasticity, Virtual Work Principle, Plane Stress and Plane Strain problems, processes of FE Analysis, Equations of Equilibrium and Compatibility, Differences of Triangle and Rectangle Elements, the Displacement Function, and the relationship between partial and holistic Coordinates. The calculation issue was the FE Analysis for Truss Framework. To be able to solve it, one should learn Calculus, know how to integral and differential, acknowledge theoretical and material mechanics, and the most important, to be familiar with Linear Algebra, for matrixes calculation. I finished it in a fastest speed that I could, ‘cause in my head no care of the exam exists any more. All I want is to say goodbye to those damned examinations. （如果对力学么兴趣，请跳过这一段）

I celebrated today by singing loudly in the doom in heavy music, and my roommate cheered his victory by handing in his exam paper first in the classroom. So far we all have escaped from the evil hands of the exams. Look back on them no matter what scores we have had, we feel tired and exhausted, in this kind of campuses. I am not fear of the exams, but I sit here and ask myself, I took them for what. The truth is, I gained few skills from hundreds of exams except the skill to get marks. That’s the grief I had for a long time.

But finally, the farewell comes. I shall no longer suffer from these disgusting things, even though I am applying for a master’s program. I know what master will do is not aiming on the exams, but something really worthy dealing. Creative outcomes and innovations can bring me joys and funs. I am now full of illusions of my life in the future, successfully enrolled in my yearning university. Yes, all the assumptions are based on I continue my education out of mainland.

If I could, I surely would hold my dream. But what is waiting for me, study or work, I could not tell.

For fifteen years, I have come through a long way here.  

Fifteen years in school and last 4 years without parents’ company.  4 years of myself in 15. 

Fifteen years’ splendors and applauses do not mean an admiring result in the end people will think of. 

The eventual success and recognitions are less important than nothing for a thriving young man full of ambitions.

But time easily idled away when I suddenly found danger grew even stronger in the last minutes. 

I shall not surrender to frailty. I could have done my endeavor before my fate is decided.

Whatever I would miss these days, I don’t want to lose my future. 

Otherwise my failure as a student would be my fault as a son.

Do not leave anything regretting on the road approaching to the dream desired. I promise myself.

Strive in fortitude, for my father and Lord. 

May what I decided today echos in the coming spring!

December 6, 2005

PS:My space will remain non-updated for an uncertain period from now on, just like in September.

Beg all your forgiveness and kind consideration.

The series stories of My College Life should come to a stop. It is not simply because time is limited during the busy and critical days, but also I don’t wanna be surprised by an unexpected discovery that I am a promising writer. The official explanation of my decision is I am now in my seventh semester and not old enough to continue the prose Ⅶ or Ⅷ. All the distinguished visitors are strongly suggested to treasure my essays as Senior Works, not the Uncle’s Writings. ^_^

The wanted Doctor K.Z.Chen finally gave me a reply this Tuesday, which I have been waiting for nearly half a month! The expectant news brought me great excitement and a relieving breath but it lasted just no more than two minutes. Look at his damning ending: I am going to retire in two years, so I do not recruit any new students. You may talk to…. And then my application process restarts.

The latest good news is the completion of the PRP mid-term report. After spending plenty of time on it, my partner and I have accomplished 17 pages with a passing standard. It is not an excellent piece of work which, I think, is supposed to be better in the final if we make more efforts. Anyway, this short break will rest me for a while, and then an acceleration of my journey must be carried out.